Tuesday, 14 March 2017
The Baked Beans Dilemma
So there I was last Saturday preparing breakfast for the family. The eggs were frying happily in the pan whilst the sausages and bacon were under the grill. The mushrooms and tomatoes warming gently and the toast just popped out of the toaster.
I opened a can of beans, poured it in the pan and ... to my surprise, it was all tomato sauce. I looked deep in the pan ... just tomato sauce. I stirred in a spoon and ... success ... I found one bean. Just one bean. The whole can was filled with tomato sauce and just one bean.
I looked under the lid in case the other beans were hiding there. But no ... none were to be seen.
I read the label in case this was a new economy brand of beans with fewer beans to cut costs. But no ... it seemed a normal can. The ingredients said "65% beans, 20% tomato juice, 10% water." It did not say what the remaining 5% was made of.
I read the instructions again, in case they expected me to plant the bean and grow more beans like in the story Jack and the Beanstalk. But no ... all it said was heat gently in a pan for a few minutes. Do not let boil.
So ... what do I do next? Breakfast is almost ready. The family is gathering round the table. I search the cupboard for another tin. There was none. This was the last one.
I hear singing from the other room, "Why are we waiting? Why are we waiting?"
What do I do in this situation? I can hardly serve beans on toast with no beans? Or cut the one bean into tiny portions to serve everyone?
What would you do?
I quickly picked a packet of frozen peas from the freezer and poured a generous portion into the beans sauce and turned the heat on.
Et voila ... baked peas on toast.
The family complained that these were not beans. I told them they were a new kind of green beans especially imported from Greenland where everything is green.
They did not believe me. They said these were peas in a tomato sauce.
I think education is a bad thing. People should believe what I tell them not what they have learnt.